Dear Abby

WIFE’S CELL PHONE MYSTERY MAN UNSETTLES HER HUSBAND

ABBY: My wife of 25 years has been talking on the phone with
a married man who lives in a city 300 miles away. They chat
for more than an hour a week. Our cell phone bills indicate
that this has been going on for more than a year.

I have decided there is nothing to gain by confronting her
with this information, but every few months I wonder. She
has never talked to me about him. There is no way she has
been able to see this man during this time, but I wonder
why she hasn’t mentioned that she has a “phone pal.”

At least she got him to stop calling the house and hanging
up when I answered. (She noticed I looked at the caller
ID.) Any suggestions?
– SUSPICIOUS IN COLUMBUS

SUSPICIOUS: I sure do. With cell phone statement in hand,
ask your wife who she has been talking to for the past
year and why she never mentioned it to you. Something IS
obviously going on, and you have a right to know the truth.
If you aren’t satisfied with her answers, call the phone
number yourself. The longer you ignore the problem, the
deeper in trouble your marriage will be.
ABBY: For the past week I have been remodeling my home.
Workers have asked to use my bathroom, which is a problem
for me as I feel it is an invasion of a personal, private
space. I feel they should have a porta-potty in their vans
or find a public toilet nearby.

Am I wrong? I hate saying “no,” but I feel my privacy is
stolen.
– PRIVACY, PLEASE, IN MONTANA

P.P.: Call your contractor and ask that a portable toilet
be provided to the workers on your job. However, if that’s
not possible, rather than telling the people remodeling
your house to find a public toilet, I’m advising you to
relent. Happy workers do better work, regardless of what
field they’re in. And when work is being done in my home,
I not only allow workers to use the “facilities,” I also
offer them a cold drink on a hot day. (Hint, hint.)

ABBY: I just got back from one of the best vacations I have
had in my life. It was relaxing, and I had a blast. Do you
think it’s weird that I went on that vacation alone with my
father-in-law?

His son, “Blake,” and I have been married for 14 years, and
I have been around the family for more than 20. I met Blake
when we were both in high school.

Before the trip, Dad and I got negative comments when the
upcoming vacation was mentioned. Was it “inappropriate”?
Or are the people saying so jealous they don’t share a
close relationship with their in-laws?

Blake and my mother-in-law were fine with the idea. Dad
had fun telling people we met on the trip that I was his
“secretary.” We laughed about it — but when we told them
I was his daughter-in-law, they looked perplexed.

I love my in-laws as if they were my own parents. What’s
your take on our vacation? I am 37.
– “BLONDIE” IN JACKSONVILLE, FLA.

BLONDIE: Your letter is a first. I would have to say the
situation is unusual. However, because the trip was taken
with your husband’s and your mother-in-law’s blessing, and
nothing untoward occurred — then “evil be he (or she) who
thinks evil of it.”