Dear Abby

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I have a wonderful relationship,
but there is one big problem. I don’t like to share blankets
at bedtime. The truth is, I like to sleep comfortably with
my blankets tucked all around. I have honestly tried sharing,
but I can’t sleep that way or even get comfortable. My
boyfriend thinks I’m weird and that I don’t like being close
to him at night. Isn’t sharing a bed enough?
– CREATURE OF HABIT

DEAR CREATURE: In my opinion it is, but because your
boyfriend doesn’t agree with you, you DO have a problem.
Getting enough sleep is important for maintaining one’s
health, and studies show that people aren’t getting enough
of it these days. Try explaining this to him, along with
the fact that intimacy is what happens BEFORE you hit the
sheets.

However, if he still doesn’t get it, then he will have to
decide whether your virtues outweigh your “idiosyncrasy.”
(Believe me, I’ve heard worse.)

DEAR ABBY: My darling husband, “Darren,” and I are soul
mates, yet he has asked me for a divorce. He says it’s not
because he doesn’t love me, but because he does.

Abby, we may be facing bankruptcy. Darren doesn’t want to
drag me and my credit down. He doesn’t want to leave, and
thinks that after we divorce our life can go on as it has
been — although on paper we’ll no longer be husband and
wife.

My first thought was, No! We are husband and wife. I MEANT
“for richer or poorer.” We’re in our 50s, and Darren says
he is looking out for my future.

I am committed to my marriage and believe we’re in this
financial situation together. I didn’t marry Darren for his
money, and I certainly don’t want to divorce him over money.

Darren swears this isn’t an excuse to get out of our marriage.
He says we can be married again as soon as we’re back on our
feet. Am I wrong about this, Abby? Should I “suspend” our
marriage? It’s breaking my heart to even consider it.
– IN TEARS IN TUCSON

DEAR IN TEARS: Dry your tears and make an appointment for
you and Darren to consult your CPA. Your husband is either
misguided, or he MAY be making an excuse to get out of the
marriage.

Because the bills were run up during your marriage, divorce
may not relieve you from liability. Of course, laws vary from
state to state, however, it may be possible for your husband
to file bankruptcy on his own. Furthermore, there needs to be
a reason for divorce, and there are penalties for making
false statements. So I don’t recommend it.

DEAR ABBY: I am being married this year and have an etiquette
question. A close family member was recently arrested and
will be in jail at the time my wedding takes place. Because
of our close relationship, I would like to invite him, but
I’m worried that to do so would be considered more offensive
than not inviting him, as he will obviously not be able to
attend. What do you think?
– TRYING TO BE KIND IN SAN FRANCISCO

DEAR TRYING TO BE KIND: Because of the circumstances, write
your family member a letter telling him that you are being
married, that you love him, and you will be thinking of him
on your wedding day. My feeling is sending a formal invitation
would make him feel even more isolated and left out than he
already does.

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