Dear Abby

DEAR ABBY: I am a nurse, writing in response to the letter
from “Flabbergasted Parents in New Mexico” (July 19). I have
worked in small community hospitals and in the emergency
rooms of trauma centers in larger cities. Over the years,
I have seen many young ladies in their early 20s come into
the ER with abdominal pain. When asked if there is a “poss-
ibility” that they could be pregnant, they say no. Even
after a pelvic exam, when they are being taken up to labor
and delivery, they deny they are having a baby.

This is like a pseudo-pregnancy, where the person thinks
she is pregnant and has all the symptoms but isn’t, in
REVERSE. In their minds, these ladies feel that the possi-
bility of pregnancy is not an option — so mind-over-matter
takes over.

“Taryn,” the girl in the letter, was probably not lying. She
just could not face the truth until her baby actually came.
Our bodies are amazing vehicles when you think about it.
– TRISHA IN NORTH BALTIMORE, OHIO

DEAR TRISHA: And so are our minds, apparently. I have a stack
of mail on my desk verifying the fact that it’s not unheard
of for a woman to carry a baby well into pregnancy — and
even to term — without knowing she’s pregnant.

DEAR ABBY: As an RN, I have seen this happen several times.
Most interesting was a middle-aged mother of two teenagers.
Because both had been delivered by scheduled C-section, she
had never experienced labor pains.

She had always been “chubby” and had been premenopausal with
irregular periods for some time. She thought she had finally
entered menopause and that the strange sensations she had
been experiencing for the past few months were just “gas.”
Now she was truly scared, thinking the pain she was experi-
encing meant something was dreadfully wrong.

She and her husband were shocked at the diagnosis — a full-
term pregnancy in active labor! Needless to say, she was
taken to surgery for another C-section.
– RN IN TEXAS

DEAR ABBY: In late November of 1964, I went to my M.D. with
a horrible backache. I’d had my periods all along and no
abdominal discomfort. After examining me, he congratulated
me on my near-term pregnancy!

Needless to say, I was caught off guard and questioned the
diagnosis. My daughter was born two months later. You could
call it the shortest pregnancy ever.

By the way, I’m a nurse and have seen this happen more than
once.
– SHERRY IN NEVADA

DEAR ABBY: I had my period the whole nine months. I only
learned I was pregnant at seven months because I passed out.
I also know of an OB nurse who didn’t know she was pregnant
until she delivered. (Boy, was SHE surprised!)

If the girl in that letter got pregnant because of rape or
sexual abuse, she may have blocked the memory of it happen-
ing. As for not knowing what was happening during and after
delivery — if she had blocked out the traumatic event, then
she may have blocked out the birth process as well.
– FUTURE COUNSELOR IN SPRINGFIELD, OHIO

DEAR ABBY: I worked for a school of medicine in the Southwest
for seven years, and I was amazed at the number of women who
had no idea they were pregnant or how it had happened. Sadly,
there are still groups of people out there who don’t discuss
sex, and the consequences of unprotected sex, with their
children. Unlikely as it seems, that poor girl may have been
telling the truth when she said she “didn’t know what was
going on.” Hopefully, she will now become better educated
about such things.
– CONNIE IN COLORADO

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